I don't mind if you've got something nice to say about me
And I enjoy an accolade like the rest
You could take my picture and hang it in a gallery
Of all who's who and so-n-so's that used to be the best
At such'n'such ... it wouldn't matter much
I won't lie, it feels alright to see your name in lights
We all need an 'Atta boy' or 'Atta girl'
But in the end I'd like to hang my hat on more besides
The temporary trappings of this world
I want to leave a legacy
How will they remember me?
Did I choose to love? Did I point to You enough
To make a mark on things?
I want to leave an offering
A child of mercy and grace who
blessed your name unapologetically
And leave that kind of legacy
I don't have to look too far or too long awhile
To make a lengthly list of all that I enjoy
It's an accumulating trinket and a treasure pile
Where moth and rust, thieves and such will soon enough destroy
Not well traveled, not well read, not well-to-do or well bred
Just want to hear instead, "Well Done" good and faithful one...
well, is the 2nd time i heard my boss says, " Although you are going already, can you show a better attitude in your work? How can you give me this kind of slip-shod work?!"
sighz.. wat can i say? i was actually angry and disappointed when i heard this. Not my boss but at myself. that i actually gave her that impression that i have done my work anyhowly?! i really did try my best and i knew it and i think my BIG BOSS knows it. And i guess thats enough?
i was praying for grace, mercy, favour, blessings and peace for myself, Esther and my boss. Both Esther n I are going thru the same symptoms of stress.. so, i guessed it must be spiritual! yes, so i reminded myself to be covered in the blood of Jesus and put on the armour of God! today was quite ok..mainly cos my boss wasnt free, so nt really in the office..but in the evening, i kena again. I was reprimanded why I was so slow? Not that I want to... how do I explain? I did not even stop to take my dinner lor...
I told her i wasnt finished and she insisted me to send her the copy. So i sent and then she was unhappy with the job. well, i explained but she think is just an excuse. she thinks that i'm talking back to her. well, another case of bad attitude i guess... similar to my ex-boss.. i think all my bosses think that i have bad attitude! sighz! i work so hard and tried my best but all of them think that i got bad attitude. i guess is reali down to my lousy communication skill bah.
but surprisingly, i wasnt actually feeling down when she told me off. i actually felt peace.. as if there's shield.. i felt the tangible peace of God over me. well.. she beh tahan liao my boss and decide to head home. she insisted that i redo the thing and sent to her again...and i did.. i dun mind.. cos i think thats reali not a good job done... but im slow mah..wat to do?
then something amazing happened! always on the vista!! i reali hate the system. the copy that i was working on is a "save" copy but just a "read only"... so after i happily finished everything and about to send, i realise the copy has went "missing"!! like nothing was there before. i really gave myself a tight slap for doing that. this was the 2nd or 3rd time it happened! i shld have learnt my mistake! but i really din rem i did not "save as" but just merely "open" it. anyway, the bottomline of this is: I HATE VISTA!
well, just at that time my boss called from her home. she asked y the doc wasnt sent to her yet. i told her i forgot to save and she was again v angry..and i promised to send her within 15min... which i hope i did finish my 15min... i can guess why she's angry. im even upset with myself! she's going to be very busy and so she will nt have the time to go thru... and so she will have to work till late today... v late, that is. most prob she will come in tmr with a super black face cos of lack of sleep cos she will be v bz tmr also... and reason? cos of my late work!
well, wat can i do? i just got to pray that i do as best as i could. if it still looks like i did my work slip-shod, i really have got nothing to say. actuali, i think the next few days, i will sure still kena scolded cos i reali cant get the banners out. i could c she's running out of patience.. and im running out of ideas... i guess my skill is reali nt that good lah... how? so many times, i thought i just want to telll her to fire me cos i reali cant do and duno how to do. but that sounds so irresponsible! and then, i will just be another case of AP to her again...
so how? well, God bless me... Lord, give me creativity, speed and productivity!!!