I don't mind if you've got something nice to say about me
And I enjoy an accolade like the rest
You could take my picture and hang it in a gallery
Of all who's who and so-n-so's that used to be the best
At such'n'such ... it wouldn't matter much
I won't lie, it feels alright to see your name in lights
We all need an 'Atta boy' or 'Atta girl'
But in the end I'd like to hang my hat on more besides
The temporary trappings of this world
I want to leave a legacy
How will they remember me?
Did I choose to love? Did I point to You enough
To make a mark on things?
I want to leave an offering
A child of mercy and grace who
blessed your name unapologetically
And leave that kind of legacy
I don't have to look too far or too long awhile
To make a lengthly list of all that I enjoy
It's an accumulating trinket and a treasure pile
Where moth and rust, thieves and such will soon enough destroy
Not well traveled, not well read, not well-to-do or well bred
Just want to hear instead, "Well Done" good and faithful one...
Why are you cast down, O my soul? And why are you disquieted within me? Hope in God; For I shall yet praise Him, For the help of my countenance and my God.
i have made some resolutions for the coming year. though i noe is not going to work, but i reckon that speaking out will better confirm wat i wanna do than when i din say out. this is wat i learn from reading a book. i think is on psychology... issit? well, it says that when one speaks out, it will further confirm wat one is thinking about and even instills certain confidence in the answer.
anyway, i made a rededication to the Lord ydae. i will stop logging on to my msn for 2 weeks, if possible, dun on the computer at all. i need to get rid some of my fats before it gets out of hand. and im going to save!
anyway, im in a certain state of uneasiness and maybe a bit of unhappiness. sigh. but it wun be convenient to say it here though.
do u noe that xmas is because of Christ, not santa claus?
ha.. that as a side note. i was surprised that some of my international frens do not noe. only santa for Christmas. hey. thats y is call CHRISTmas rite?? that also got to show how the world has succesfully portray commercialism and materialism to tell people to buy, buy, buy for Christmas! and the success of secularism of not mentioning CHRIST for Christmas. bad...
anyway, to digress... as the end of this year has been coming, i will usually reflect wat has happened this year and ask the Lord for wat is coming ahead next year. i looked in my journal and i realised that wat the Lord has told me that is coming for this year has come to pass. and so, im pretty accurate spiritually (for myself :P). anyway, upon praying for wat is coming ahead this coming year, i sensed that this coming year will be a difficcult one for me. but well, is always in difficult times we will get treasures that we dun usually get - treasures of darkness. and that means, i will grow up more. is only when u fall down, u will grow up faster. isnt it?
i was doing my QT today. and the Lord spoke. a warning from Revelations. gotta be watchful... definitely a verse for me coz i noe it is that is exactly happening to me. is the Lord's mercy that brings us to repentance. asked the Lord to plant in me a seed for the love for holiness. and somehow, i felt that something was planted in me when i prayed that. and i receive it by faith! :)
i think i qualify to graduate in masters in art of crapping and smoking thru.
ha! the mba essay that i helped my fren to do actuali got a PASS! though i have to say it only just got thru.. haa.. thats y i qualify for smoking...
ok.. the good news is that i have to help her in another one again. din noe my ang moh so good lei. or rather her ang moh no good lah. i was checking thru her work till 4am his morning... dun think im so diligent or enthusiastic abt my own assignments... which i usuali dun hand up...
and i am still awake. somehow i just couldnt get to sleep. perhaps is coz i have exceeded the sleeping time. or perhaps is the teh-peng i had around 1am. im still awake. and i can hear the birds chirping aredi. perhaps i should go for a jog. hvnt jog in the morning ever since i graduated from college. no pe. not healthy anymore.
should have spent my time praying or the bible then spending time online. well, instead of regretting, y dun i do it now? ha. indeed. mind is enmity against God. the thought of praying or reading bible coz my mind to feel sleepy liao. ha. just the thought only lei.
ok. this time im reali resolute to keep this out of my life for till the end of this year. well, maybe i will post one or 2 before the end of the year, to mayb recap wat has happened this whole year. and mayb if there are some interesting stuff that i can blog on. :)
have updated some things on this site. eg. my profile and links. and of coz, the scripture on my main window. my fave verse. that i may lay hold of Him as He laid hold of me!
distracted and frustrated a while ago. things just like to come together at the same time. argh! i just cldnt tolerate noise. it just got on my nerves. and i couldnt think properly. and guess wat. i will snap. but of coz, i will control myself. and that got worse when i have to think properly of certain things. like dates and appointments and some of my schedule and plannings. and last but not least, the printer has to be a tad crazy not able to print and print out of alignment when i need to print things! on top of that, ppl just suddenly keep msgging me when im struggling with all these when a moment ago, my hp is just so quietly sitting by itself when i am so so free! sigh. feeling a bit overwhelmed suddenly.
mayb i shldnt have multitask. i shldnt have look at my msg until i have finished my stuff at hand. then i wouldnt be to worry abt setting a date for the xmas event. then i can just figure wat wats wrong my printer and the alignment. and yeah, i shld have just close the door! my bro and sis were squabbling a while ago. kids stuff. but they are the ones who reali got me on my nerves by all those noise.
im usuali laidback. but when things come. im not. mayb i dun reali can handle stress then ppl thot i can...
and yar, now im suddenly all free up! my bro and sis have just went downstairs to jog. i have finished printing my stuffs. i have finished deciding on the dates and schedules of wat i shld. and my hp stop beeping! ha. and thats y i can blog this. madness...
thinking of posting a blog, but i got nothing blog. ha. irony. so.. wta shld i say here.. maybe just some rants here and there. y am i still awake at this hour of the day is coz i just had my supper and im feeling oh-so-full. sigh.. mayb i shldnt have eaten. coz my weight did went down a bit last few days. haa... but of coz, i eating normally minus the junks and the binges though. actuali, i dun reali binge. hm.. ha.. thats it. i've got nothing to say liao. bleah~
hai... sleeping at this kind of time is reali bad for me. all of my frens have been telling me that sleeping late is very bad for health especially my liver which have to work doubly hard coz it is ard 10pm to 7am, it will start to intoxicate.. my poor liver... too bad, it has to work for me lah... im the master..haa!
yes, i do notice i have to start studying and revise my work. couldnt afford to keep them all for the last minute. will passed. definitely. so far, i hvnt failed anything that is essay-based. that got to show how good im at crapping and point out my viewpoints abt stuff. but if i want to get a good honours, thats another thing. i have been skipping my classes. my frens have all been saying that im just paying the school for nothing. yeah, must it a point to go. not for the money. but for that im a child of Christ, and i do want to show a good impression to my frens around me. nto just go to church and not go to school. and not studying! yes, thats wat i have been saying. im studying for God and my parents this time round, not for myself! if for myself, i wouldnt have care less about it. ha.. my fren juz commented that studies to me is like nothing on tuesday. im always stress free about it. ya, most prob. coz is not on my priority. but i guess. i do need to make it a point to study well. afterall, i find that wat im studying are actually rather interesting. heh...
ok..i got nothing else to say le... sigh.. dun feel like sleeping either. and theres NOBODY online at 3.09am on my msn. ha!
this song was use in my fren's montage yesterday during their wedding. the montage was very well done and kinda cute. like this song. haa.. so decide to put up the lyrics here. :)
thats the 1st thing i nd to say. :( how many times do i nd to be convicted before i finally surrender? sigh... GRACE IS WHAT I NEED!
but just want to update a few things before i "retire"... i will spend less time on this monster. doing more things that are productive to the Kingdom of God. ie. not only my ministries and myself also. minus all the unneccessary things. all in all, it means, put God 1st in watever i do. not there to be anything else before Him. sis nita johnson said something very interestingly and soberly and truely a few days ago. " The Church is sleeping and is living like exactly like the world and they dun even know it." how true. how scary. we all nd to repent. all about turn in the things we do wrongly.
on another note, i had an interesting day today. morning i was at a water baptism service of my latest cell member. was good. wonderful. she is very very happy. we bought her a cross ydae and presented it to her which she wore it immediately. plus a card which i had done till 2am. shouldnt have took that long. but well...
afterwards, we adjourned to my cell leader's hse for housewarming. nto bad. designs contemporary. i think now most of the new couples' hses are all furnished up to the latest design. toking about how rich we sporeans are actually when many many people dun even have a proper homes under their roofs. ok, i wasnt sayign anything abt my cell leader. my hse IS also design "lavishly".. have to admit is nice living in a nice furnished hse.. and it is God's blessing that we can have that. my cell leader is getting married on boxing day! the last wedding im to attend for this year..phew! today, while on the way to michelle's wedding, my fren actuali said we should set up a personal attend-wedding-fund coz we simpy have too many weddings to attend. haa...
ok, yar..last on my item today is michelle's wedding. was nice(an understatement) and loving. the emcees are funnie. i have not seen more funny emcees than they. most of the emcees are quite standard and formal. guess coz chinese congre ppl are more like one big family than the english congre one. the love of God was in the place! i could sense the pleasure of God upon them, and i somehow fully identified with wat Pst Lip prayed that he sensed that God will give them an inheritance. whoa! i guess that was the best gift God could have given anyone for their wedding. ha. oh yar, magnets containing their photo are given as door gifts. they are very nice. but i wonder wat i can do with them. i have just put them on my desk. nice! but as i was looking at it, i somehow find it strange... hmm... coz.. why should i put their photo on my desk?? *scratch scratch* should be a photo of at least my grp of frens with me or me with my other half rite? hmm...nvm... still nice lah
ok, that for now. i shall stop update this thing that often. maybe i should push my comp out of my room like i did to my tv a few years ago...
Because grace is the only thing that transforms us, and since grace is only given to the humble, the only way to move forward in our Christian walk is by humbling ourselves. In order to receive new grace into our lives which leads to new growth, there must be a fresh kneeling at the foot of the cross. This is one reason it is good to have a problem we are unable to solve on our own. when a problem is beyond our limits, we have to humble ourselves and go to others for help. This opens the door to new grace (Jas 4:10).
Grace is given in time of need. Therefore, the ones who passed through the most difficulties and have met God, in them possess the most grace in their lives. A painful situation is an opportunity for life-changing grace. We can choose to open or close our vessel to grace.
It is within the power of our choice to receive or reject grace. When we are injured, immediately we are faced with a decision. We may harden our hearts and reject grace, or we may cry out to God for His grace to sustain us in our time of trouble. His grace is sufficient (2 Cor 12:9) but if we harden our hearts, the flow of grace is stopped and bitterness sets in (Heb 12:15). It is like putting a lid on our vessel, prohibiting the inpouring of grace. Therefore, we should keep our vessel open at all times to the wonderful riches of God's grace. The only time we should close our vessel is when there is plague or death in the air (i.e. gossip, false doctrine; see Numb 19:14-15).
Paul kept this vessel open to God and accumulated an enormous amount of grace as the years passed (1 Tim 1:12,14). As grace is constantly poured into our lives day by day, we amass what Paul described as "abundance of grace" (Rom 5:17). Abundance of grace is required to reign in this life and in the age to come. Scripture mentions 3 levels of grace: sufficient grace - enough to get us through (2 Cor 12:9), abundance of grace - to reign in life (Rom 5:17), and exceeding abundant grace - to utterly transform us and make us more than conquerors (1 Tim 1:13-14).
"Noah found grace in the eyes of the Lord" (Gen 6:8). Others did not! Yet God has no favourites. Why do some receive grace but not others? It depends on the attitude. God gives grace to the humble but He resists the proud. Thus, our attitude determines how much grace we receive (Isa 57:15).
fancy writing a testimony for a job application form. this is my 1st. ha. i was in a way at a loss what to write hence i procrastinated for quite some time. not coz i dun hv anything to write but rather, there are simply too many to say. a Christian life is way much exciting that it seemed it is! ha..anyway, i decided to write it today. And lo and behold! i managed to somehow write a short summary. i was surprised, coz i firmly believe is inspired by the Holy Spirit Himself. just thot to put up here...
I came to know the Lord Jesus Christ in the year 1998 after getting saved through a street evangelism. Although I have to admit that I did not really understand what I was doing at that time, I believe that the Lord took me for my word. By His grace and mercy, I was brought into the Kingdom of God and receive that salvation that He offered to me.
For the first few years, I did not really understand what is to be a Christian, and my life was up and down like a roller coaster. Until one day in 2001, during an altar call, I heard the call of discipleship from the Lord to “deny myself, pick up the cross and follow Him”. This became my turning point in my whole life as a Christian. My life was no longer just an “ups and downs” but rather having that direction and knowledge of who I am as a disciple of Christ and I found myself wanting to please Him more than I ever wanted in my entire life. It was also around that time I baptized in the Holy Spirit and got the gift of speaking in tongues. From then, the spiritual realm seemed to be a lot more different to me than ever before. It was a reality! So, I really have to emphasize that I believe in the gift of the Holy Spirit and speaking in tongues very much as I have a personal experience on it.
It was also that year that I felt called to missions. I do not know if I am really called to be a missionary or full-time, but from then on, I have been preparing myself spiritually and all that I can. So that if ever the Lord is going to be used me in this area, I would be ready and able to. I am still in the midst of preparing myself so that I will be of use in the Kingdom of God. The Lord Himself is also still dealing with many areas of my life which still need much consecration and pruning.
just when i said that this world is a crazy world, i just got to noe that in msia, a private hospital refused to treat a young man who was seriously injured after he got attacked by 2 men because his uncle was unable to pay the huge amount of deposit at the time. ridiculous!
just finished reading/ flipping thru the new paper (yes, i do read that), and i found myself reading the some of the amazng things. one of which is that ppl was keeping vigil for the aussie drug criminal with vietnam name(pls be aware that im not being racist or nationalist or watever u call that, my english not that gd anyway). i reali cant believe it man! y are ppl getting so work up over him when he has done wrong? im nt saying that im condemning him or saying that he shldnt get a chance, but to the extent of keeping vigil for him when he drug traffick! to me, i duno how to say, but ppl all over the world now are standing up for things that shldnt be standing up for. and keeping quiet for those things that should be stood up. ridiculous!
next, the O levels bio students cut their fingers while cutting a whole carrot with a big penknife. abt 0.4% hurt themselves, the one on the headlines was a bit more serious and the photo of her finger reali loook quite terrible. i have to admit that initially when i read that headline, i was like thinking, dun tell me that sporean kids are so pampered now that they dun even noe how to cut a carrot? after the reading the whole article, i can understand y. is reali quite difficult to cut a carrot with a penknife. anyway, the percentage is quite low. so alrite lah. but but... is still strange...
afterwhich, i forgot wat i read from the newspapers liao.
only that this year's economy had been quite good and there will much bonus at the end of this year! wow... ( as if, my business...haa.. me nt wkg yet) but good lah... happy for those wkg ppl... haa...
im also crazy... and one thing... i think i have turned nocturnal!! :(
haha..quite happy with the new skin, but there are some things here and there not very congruent and have yet to do, like putting up the comment link.. or shld i put up a tag board... well, or i jus dun ask for any suggestions watsoever! haha... time flies.. i was so sleepy thruout the whole day and at 12mn just now. but im so awake now! oh no.. that means tmr my day will be an inverted one agn. argh..bad time clock for my body.. tsktsk.. bad for my health as well :(
anyway, change my skin coz i was rather bored, so i decided to change it. hm.. and while doing the picture, i realised my external hdd is faulty! sigh..just when im at my poorest..or rather im not v well-to-do and my things are mostly starting to fall apart..bleah! have to bring them to repair.. that includes my digicam which i have failed to bring it to c its doc since aug! anyway, praise God! i do not nd to buy a new printer at the moment coz my sis' bf, calvin just lend us his 3-in-1 machine coz he dun reali used it. heh.. mayb then i will try to post up wat i orginally wanted but din coz my scanner's down as well. oh, im going to post up the various wedding cards i have received for this year. i have attended quite a number of weddings this year! and im going to go for another 2 before this year end. ha..yar..that many. anyway, reason y i posting them up coz most of them designs are nice! so just have the thought of sharing them..heh.. well, that also have to do with when im going to set up the machine and when i have the time to do them.
well, have wanted to use the word "anyway" again, but i guess i overused it! yar..my vocab is that limited..ahhaa... engrish not very good lah. ok, i shall use anyhow instead. haa. went for a seminar today and ydae.. was quite amazing. i always enjoy thinking especially where chim words and ideas are involved. cause me to think. but of coz i also like the very very simple english that i enjoy a lot. mediocre is not accepted. ( as if i very chim lidat...) have to emphasize that im not smart, but just boh liao.. like to challenge myself over things that ppl usuali dun understd. haha.. *arrogance* however, i dun always understd myself either..hehe... ok, i shall stop the crap.