I don't mind if you've got something nice to say about me
And I enjoy an accolade like the rest
You could take my picture and hang it in a gallery
Of all who's who and so-n-so's that used to be the best
At such'n'such ... it wouldn't matter much
I won't lie, it feels alright to see your name in lights
We all need an 'Atta boy' or 'Atta girl'
But in the end I'd like to hang my hat on more besides
The temporary trappings of this world
I want to leave a legacy
How will they remember me?
Did I choose to love? Did I point to You enough
To make a mark on things?
I want to leave an offering
A child of mercy and grace who
blessed your name unapologetically
And leave that kind of legacy
I don't have to look too far or too long awhile
To make a lengthly list of all that I enjoy
It's an accumulating trinket and a treasure pile
Where moth and rust, thieves and such will soon enough destroy
Not well traveled, not well read, not well-to-do or well bred
Just want to hear instead, "Well Done" good and faithful one...
trying to do that for the past week. before u think of anything negative. well, is not the physical killing, rather i just wan to refuse to feed my old man. ha. by that, if u are not a fellow-in-Christ, i think u wun understand wat im toking abt. which i think is kind of bad coz i cant think of how to express in non-Christian lingo. hw to explain my non_Christian frens and even share Christ?
anyway, the nick that i put in my msn is real.."i am sick and tired of myself. i want to die!!!" i noe is impossible to crucify myself, but have to allow God to kill one thing at a time. one of the thing that im tryin to do for the moment, is to stop blogging for the time being. ok, this time i failed coz i thot i ought to give an explanation for the lack of blogs b4 i stop for the time being.
y do i wanna stop? coz i realise that every entry that i have is self-centred. and very soulish. y? coz everything in the blog is abt me, myself and I. I, I, I with the capital I! so, i have decided to stop for the time-being. i have to keep feeding my newman. spiritman so that i will be strong and be led by the spirit, not soulish and led by my emotions. that is the difference! these few days i have been preventing myself from blogging and visit other ppl's blogs coz i noe every blog i read will affect me. every entry i read will spur a thought in me abt .. yes.. MYSELF again. nt that i shld be of devoid to feelings, but rather nt be CONTROL by them. God made us with emotions. but not emotional. a man who is double-minded is unstable in all his ways. (James 1), and a man who rules his spirit is much more than he who takes a city! (Proverbs)..
yar, so thats y.. im believing God for wat He wants to do in me, and that He can do thru me and use me. :) before i go, lemme take an excerpt taken from Paul Caram's Victory Over the Self-Centred Life.
The Problem of Soulishness
God wants His people to be spiritual, not soulish. Oftentimes the soul (emotions, fears, moods, partiality, etc) gets in the way of the Spirit and hinders the flow of the Holy Spirit. A soulish person is dominated by the emotions which bring on depression, discouragement, and other feelings. God wants us to be discern the difference between soulish and spiritual. The Word of God divides soul from the spirit (Heb 4:12). The Word of God can show us what is genuinely spiritual (what is originating from the Holy Spirit through our spirit) and what is coming from the soul or emotions. The Word of God can show us what our real problems are and why we are frequently depressed or angry. We do not need to go to the psychiatrist. God alone knows what is at the bottom of our conflicts, and He is well able to show us clearly from the Word of God.
Hebrew 4:12 - Thh Word of God divides the soul from the spirit. It separates soulishness (feelings, emotions, natural thinking) from what is truly spiritual. The Word of God not only shows us what is soulish or emotional, but it also reveals the deepest motives of our spirit. The Word of God locates our problems and shows us what is wrong in our soul (emotions) in our spirit (motives). It is like a light that is turned on within. "The entrance of thy Word giveth light"(Psa 119:130). Often we are unable to put our finger on our real problem, but the Word of God pinpoints and remedies them.
We must overcome soulishness, for when we are dominated by our feelings, we will not be stable in character and will make decisions according to our emotions. Emotions are also very partial. Pity and need should not be what prompts one to go to the mission field - a divine call should be the motivation. People who are soulish are very susceptible to other spirits moving upon them and prompting them, deflecting them from God's purposes. Emotions are good, however, if produced by the Spirit.
The soul must not rule! The spirit, with God's Spirit overshadowing, should rule! The soul must be under the control of the spirit and Holy Spirit. Listed below are some other evidenced of th soul ruling:
Infatuation- fantasy, dream worlds - Petting is very dangerous. We must rule our spirit (Pro 4:23).
Hysteria - Job's wife was hysterical, telling Job to curse God and die. Women are urged to sobriety.
Fears - Fears of the soul can block the flow of the Holy Spirit.
Partiality - emotions that favour one above another - This is carnal love. It dulls one's discernment.
Self-pity - moods, depressions, oppressions, and being frequently subject to "dark clouds".
Suspicions and imaginations - soulish people are easily susceptible to these
Living by feelings instead of by truth - We must "walk by faith not by sight."
Humanism - which is sympathy and emotions, denies that there will be judgement.
False guidance - because of emotions, goose bumps, chills down the spine, and phenomena.
Inability to deal objectively - because of emotions that are out of control or not rational
People who live on emotional highs are usually the ones who sink to the greatest lows.
